Physical Activity

When you strengthen your body, you strengthen your mind, your heart, and your character.

Take a moment, and think back to the Paleolithic period.  Cavemen had to walk for miles just to find food; they also had to RUN for miles so they wouldn’t BECOME food. 

They built shelter with there bare hands, by lifting heavy objects, and were much more physical then your average sedentary North American today.

What does all this mean?

We’ve become an unhappy, unhealthy society, fostered by a lack of physical exertion. 

When you aren't moving, and just sitting idle, their are certain required brain functions that aren't being put to use.  Exercising causes the body to produce endorphins; these are chemicals that can help a person to feel more peaceful and happy.  Exercise can help some people sleep better.  It can also help some people who have mild depression and low self-esteem (myself included). Plus, exercise can give people a real sense of accomplishment and pride at having achieved a certain goal, be it weight loss, or improving performance for your favourite sport.

When people hear the work ‘exercise’ they usually think of:

• Running like a rat on a wheel (This can get boring REAL quickly)
• Lifting weights (I’m talking the traditional barbell/dumbbell stuff)
• Taking an aerobics class (If you’re lacking coordination, these can be a REAL test in humility)

 Exercise science, training ideas, and workout programs have come a LONG way since the dark ages of leg warmers and headbands.  I say out with the old, and in with the new! 

Below, you will find a list of some of my favorite things to do.  Try some of these ideas to get your daily work out in!

• Martial Arts/Boxing/MMA.  If you want an activity that will kick your butt, and leave you feeling drained, then training martial arts is for you.  I’ve been performing Muay Thai for the last year, and let me tell you, I thought I was in shape.  My instructor Kru Jeff showed me I wasn’t.
• Hybrid functional training.  There are a multitude of workout programs that employ bands, sandbags, boxes, risers, fancy set/rep schemes, and even your own body weight that will keep you interested.  They are not only easy to follow, but can be a LOT of fun too!  I suggest clicking here to check out a few.
• Join a recreational sport.  Hockey, Baseball, Basketball, Squash, and Racquetball are all excellent choices for the competitive enthusiast looking for a challenge.  There are usually community centers in the area that offer these types of activities.  Your local YMCA should also have many resources with regards to team sports.  Check them out!

Here are a few less demanding options that you might want to look into as well:

• Yoga.  This is a great way to quiet your mind and relax your body. There are different ways to practice yoga - some vigorous and others relaxing. Try this style of movement for maximum relaxation.
• Pilates.  While more vigorous than some types of Yoga, Pilates forces you to concentrate on what your body is doing while helping you work on core strength, stability and flexibility.
• Massage. Although not really a ‘workout’ per say I think we should all try and schedule in some massage time so you have something to look forward to. If that isn't an option, indulge at home with a hot bath or lounging around and reading your favourite book or magazine.

Nutrition

Pizza, bread, donuts, cake, and the 7-11 didn't exist back in the caveman times either, so it should come as no surprise that these things should not make up the majority of your diet.  

On a hormonal level, what we eat also affects brain function, endorphin release, and mood control.  We all want to be peaceful, and happy correct?  So eating properly is key.   

The following is an example list of foods that I recommend eating, as well as a few examples of foods that I would NOT recommend eating.  I feel that both lists are important, as there are MANY foods out there that you think are ‘OK’ when in fact, they’re not.

Acceptable Protein sources:

• Lean Beef
• Fish/seafood
• Lean Poultry
• Eggs (Whole and whites)
• Cottage Cheese
• Lean Pork
• Skim or Soy Milk

Un acceptable Protein Sources:

• Deli Meat
• Fatty meats like Duck and Ham
• Processed Meats (Hot dogs, cold cuts etc...)
• Hard Cheeses (ok in moderation)
• Whole Milk (ok in moderation)

 Acceptable Carbohydrate Sources:

• Rice (Preferably Brown)
• Potatoes (Preferably Sweet)
• Beans
• Whole Oats
• Fruit (in moderation)
• Green leafy Vegetables

Unacceptable Carbohydrate Sources:

• Maltodextrin (ok Post workout though)
• Junk Food
• Sweets
• Potato Chips
• Candies
• Cakes
• Cookies
• Alcohol
• Breads and pasta (ok in moderation)

 Recommended Fat sources:

• Avocados
• Raw Nuts (cooked in moderation)
• Cold Pressed oils:
• Extra virgin olive oil
• Borage oil
• Safflower oil
• Sunflower oil
• Flax seed oil
• Cod liver oil
• Udo's Choice 3-6-9 oil

 Unacceptable fat sources:

• Butter (ok in moderation)
• Margarine (the kind that have trans fats)
• Heated Oils

A typical meal plan should comprise 3 meals, and two snacks a day.  Here is an example diet to get you started.  Feel free to make any substitutions for the lists above.

  

Breakfast:

Choice 1

• 1 egg with 4 egg whites omelet
• You can throw in some veggies ½ cup
• 1/3 cup oatmeal

 Choice 2

• ½ cup yogurt with
• ½ cup granola
• 1 banana
• 1 whole egg

Lunch:

Choice 1: Salad

• Lean protein any kind (chicken, beef, fish, canned salmon, tuna whatever)
• 2 cups baby spinach with 1 cup veggies
• 1 piece of bread (Preferably brown)

Choice 2: Wrap

• Lean protein any kind (chicken, beef, fish, canned salmon, tuna whatever)
• Cheese 1 or 2 slices
• Veggies 1 cup
• Tortilla 1
• Lettuce/mustard

 Choice 3: Hot Lunch

• Lean protein any kind (chicken, beef, fish, canned salmon, tuna whatever)
• Veggies
• Small sweet potato or
• ½ cup of rice

 Dinner:

Choices can be the same as lunch or also

Choice 1

• Spaghetti squash
• 1 cup cottage cheese
• Spaghetti sauce ¼ cup

 Choice 2

• Lean protein any kind (Chicken, beef, fish, canned salmon, tuna whatever)
• Veggies 1 1/2cups
• Salsa
• ½ cup rice

 Snacks: 3/day

Choice 1

• Some Nuts… any kind… almonds are good
• Banana or some other fruit

Choice 2

• ½ cup cottage cheese
• ½ cup yogurt
• ¼ cup walnuts
• ¼ berries

Choice 3: Pick one cheat

(One night only)

• 1 cup frozen yogurt
• 2 rice cakes with peanut butter
• 3 cups popcorn

Drink as much coffee and tea as you like, but TRY and drink at LEAST 1/2 gallon of water (2 litres/8 cups) a day.

Woah!  That was a doozy!  I never meant to write so much, but I do feel passionate about this topic, and felt it necessary to discuss in detail.

Constant use, and the right type of fuel is important for any machine to run smoothly.  

Until next time,

Matt

Easy come, easy go

Good morning.  I haven't updated this in a while, as I've been VERY busy this holiday season, visiting the folks, and hanging with my daughter.  The holidays are now over however, and it's time to get back to reality. 

The break was good, and I really enjoyed my time with family, and friends... but I couldn't seem to shake this nagging feeling all throughout the week.  This feeling that something was missing, or wasn't right. 

One thing in particular that I noticed is that I REALLY go back to old patterns, and habits when I'm not giving myself the time and care that I need.. and THAT is where I've been going wrong.

I usually meditate every morning, then start the day off with a bit of reflection.  Lately however, I've let that slip to the wayside.  I was given a gentle reminder this morning by a GOOD friend that I was being a bit much, and that I should perhaps get back to the present. 

The funny thing is that I was SO caught up in my patterns, that I actually vocalized my displeasure with hearing such a notion, and was just about to argue back, but decided to go for a coffee instead.

Upon my return, I saw the error of my ways, and realized what had happened.  It wasn't really a matter of her being right, and me being wrong, but more of an issue with me not being in the present moment, and not appreciating and respecting myself enough. 

I AM human, and I AM going to make mistakes.  This is to be expected.  It's nice that my friend allows me the freedom to make these mistakes, without judgment, and with a lot of patience. 

Mistakes are our greatest teachers, and the take home lesson is this:

"Take care of yourself no matter what.  You are no good to others, if you are no good to yourself"

With that... I leave you with a wonderful chakra clearing meditation that helped shake the "funk" out of my head.

Namaste... love and light,

Matt

Is tomorrow REALLY Xmas Eve!!!

I still have a couple (read: lots) of things to pick up before Xmas.  Mainly wrapping paper, chocolate, stocking stuffers, and the like.  Nothing I can't handle.  I figured the mall would be total pandemonium, so I took it upon myself to start the day off well with a wonderful meditation from Deepak Chopra.

 

This one definitely got 5 stars in my book.  It was very soft and welcoming first thing in the morning.  Just what I needed.

The idea of the holiday season has finally come on full force.  I can't WAIT to get out there after work, and tear it up.

I will report back this evening.

Love and light,

Matt

Update:

I went to the mall, and it was actually pretty decent!  Not too too packed at all.  The masochistic side of me was actually kinda disappointed.

I didn't get everything I required, so I'll hit it up tomorrow again at lunch. :)

3 Days and counting!

Good morning.  Only 3 days left until the Xmas...  and MAN this is a crazy time of year.  Stress can often times rear it's ugly head, but we can all CHOOSE not to let it get to us.

Every year, I panic.  It usually begins with the idea of gifts.  I can't STAND shopping for others, as I never know what to get.  This usually turns into worry, as I consider whether or not they are going to like what I get.  I play the game of "who got *ME* a gift?", as I'll "have" to get them one, so they won't feel left out... and the cycle of stress, annoyance, and panic begins.  

Once the list has been comprised, I worry about whether or not I'm going to have enough money to pay for all these things.  This usually involves cutting other expenses, so that others are satisfied, and putting my mental sanity on hold for a bit.


We have to stop, and realize that 'worry' can only manifest itself, if we live in the future. The future is not here yet, so worry serves us no purpose.  Stop, breath, and live in the present.  

Does anyone share custody of a child?  I do.  Time sharing usually involves the parents, step-parents, multiple sets of grandparents, aunts, uncles, and everyone else that wants to see your child over the holidays.  We have to co-ordinate dinners, time spent with whom, and hoping that it all fits into a neat package that we can all agree upon.

Exhausting isn't it?  Well it doesn't have to be.

This year I have made a couple of adjustments to the whole scheme.  Under my brothers advisement: "I don't want anything this year, and I'm not buying anything this year."  

Pretty simple stuff, but kind of hard to swallow at first.  Your egoistic mind is going to want to convince you that you are being selfish.  Your mind will begin to work, and you will second guess whether or not this is a good idea.  Which will add to the current stress you are facing.  Try to remember... You are NOT responsible for others feelings, and have no bearing on them at all.  Should you choose to go this route, be proud of your decision, and embrace it.

A fellow blogger by the name of Leo Babauta, wrote a wonderful piece entitled "The Case Against Buying Christmas Presents"  Feel free to check it out!  LOTS of good stuff in there.  

The following, are a few of my own tips for other single parents out there that might find it rough around the holidays.

• Consider that the holidays, and gift giving is for the kids.  If you must make certain purchases, try and limit them to the children.  
• Employ a monetary cap of sorts, and STICK to it.  There is absolutely NO need to break the bank.  
• Focus on why you are giving.  If it is to impress the party in question, maybe you are "giving" for the wrong reason(s).
• Make gifts, bake goodies, and put a little more of a personal touch into things.  Thoughts and effort trump gift cards ever time.

The holidays should be a time of relaxation.  A time spent with family, friends, and loved ones.  A time, where stress should not dictate, nor control your emotional being.  

Remember WHY we give what we give... sit back, drink some egg nog, and be merry...

Until next time.

Matt

Ladies and Gentleman - We Have Liftoff!

Well I'm feeling fine now.  I’m not entirely certain as to what the problem was, but I feel as though nothing was even wrong.  This is very odd, and something to think about in the future.  I'm not going to argue with it.

Have a good day,

Matt

Back to the basics revisited

Interestingly enough, that didn't seem to help.  I'm sitting here at work, and the simple noise of my co-workers voices humming is very distracting, and annoying.  I can't handle this, and feel like I'm going to lose it...  

I think running, and a workout at lunch time might help... here's to hoping...

Matt

Back to the basics

How did I start this off, and what was the key to keeping me happy, healthy and sane?  It’s time we got back to the basics. 

I’ve let my daily routine completely slip, and haven’t been practicing the things that have worked thus far.  Meditation and stretching have gone to the wayside.  The familiar grind has taken over, and I have put myself second again.

I am going to start off with a nice guided mediation, followed by some light stretching, then a shower to complete the routine.

This started off sort of fast for my taste, and took a bit to get into.  It was nice, and worked well, however it ended too abruptly.  I think I may pick another piece to use next time.

I already feel much more grounded and serene. 

It’s good to be back.

Matt

Running on Empty

Tonight I feel a little lost, and empty.  It’s sort of a strange sensation; one that I haven’t felt in a long time.

I had the most wonderful weekend.  I left work on Friday evening, and went to get my daughter Lilli from her Mom’s place. 

When I got there, she was dressed up in the most beautiful outfit ever.  She likes to do up her own style, and fashion, much like her mother.

We left her Mom’s place, and headed to Baton Rouge for a Xmas party being held by a few old co-workers. 

Lilli chose her usual BBQ ribs from the kids menu, while I opted for the Baton Rouge Burger - 8 oz of Angus beef, with smokehouse bacon and melted Monterey Jack cheese.  It was like a party in my mouth, and everyone was invited.  Amazing. 

After dinner, we went out to shop for a gift for my mother’s 60th birthday.  Lilli and I were able to find a really nice foot bath set.  We weren’t sure if it was an ideal gift, but she wound up really liking it.

 

Sat afternoon was spent at my mothers place.  Her, my brother and I all hung out together.  We had a wonderful chat about life, happiness, and what it all ‘means’  I found it quite engaging, and left there feeling on top of the planet.

That evening I went to my Ottawa Academy of Martial Arts Christmas party.  I spent the evening with a REALLY good gang of people.  We had all you can eat fajitas, as well as a variety of desserts, and coffee.  We wrapped it up, and I went home at a VERY late 3:30am. 

I got up early Sunday morning, to go get Lilli…  I picked her up; went shopping at the mall for a bit and then headed back home.  We hung out here, played topple, and goofed around on the computer.  I was feeling pretty beat, and a little impatient, so I had a snooze.

When I got up however, I felt a little shorter fused then normal, and kind of grumpy.  It could have been that I hadn’t eaten properly that day, and that the nap had thrown me off, but it wasn’t a very good feeling. 

We finally took her back to her Mom’s place, and I went back home.

I still couldn’t seem to shake this feeling of annoyance.  Oddly enough it seems MUCH better after writing all this down…  I think I just need more rest.

Things I’ve discovered while writing this:

• I definitely don’t do so well if I don’t get enough sleep.
• I didn’t take the time to meditate at all this weekend; perhaps my chakras are clogged up?
• Taking the necessary time for me, and my needs is important, and required for proper mood control.

That’s it folks… Thanks for ‘listening’… until tomorrow morning.

Matt

Good morning friends!!

Creating, and updating this blog, has been one of the greatest tools that I've used so far along my journey of personal growth.  I dedicate this morning's entry to those whom have helped me on my resent quest for enlightenment, and personal awareness.  Although this is a short list, and there are certainly other people that have helped me.  These are just a gathering of those that I think deserved special mention.

In no particular order:

1.  Mélanie - Mélanie has not only been there through thick and thin, but has also been my rock, my saviour, and the keeper of my heart.  I met Mélanie some years ago, and have had the recent pleasure of re-acquainting with her.  Mélanie is the one that sparked this whole process, and has helped me see myself for who I truly am.  I love her sincerely.

2. Tina Su - Although I knew that something had to change, I wasn’t entirely sure where to start.  I began looking for answers, and happened upon Think Simple Now .  Think Simple Now, is a candidly written blog that focuses on personal happiness and addresses real-life issues on our path to inner fulfillment.  I found TSN’s articles, and blog entries to be very engaging.  Everything was laid out in a format that was easy to read and understand.  This was just what I was looking for!  After sharing much correspondence with Tina, she took a personal interest in *my* happiness, and helped me to start a daily routine to reach *my* goals.  I can proudly say that I’ve never felt better about myself.  Thank you one thousand times over Tina.  You’re the best!

3. Valerie Reynolds – My mother, my saviour.  If there were a woman who could walk on water, it would be my mom.  Mom has been in my corner, guiding me, and offering me solace throughout my entire life.  I am certain that I would not be half the man I am today without her warmth, love, and guided assistance.  I love you Mom… always, and forever.

4. Ryan Davis – You don’t happen among many people who ‘get it’ in life; my brother is one of the lucky few that do.  A speaker of few words, with an energy that could move mountains, Ryan embodies all that is Buddhism.  Anyone who can proclaim that “Happiness is waking up in the morning to the sun shining, while enjoying a glass of orange juice” doesn’t really have to say much.  He is my brother, my friend and my spiritual mentor.  I love you bro.  Thank you for everything.

5. Khrū Jeff – Khrū Jeff is my Muay Thai coach, and instructor, training out of The Ottawa Academy Of Martial Arts.  With a record of 24-5 in Amateur Muay Thai and having held provincial and Canadian National titles in CAMTAO and the World Muay Thai Federation, Khrū Jeff is no stranger to competition.  His competitive spirit and drive has helped me like no other.  When I was down on my luck; Khrū Jeff was one of the few that took a personal interest in me.  We shared a few life stories that have really helped shape me.  He reminded me that talk is cheap, and actions speak.  He checks in with me often, and reminds me to be a warrior, and to live a lifestyle that is congruent with my goals.  I love you Khrū Jeff.  Khawp khun khrap.

6. Gaetan Larocque – My boss at work and my friend in times of need.  “Gaets” has really given me a second chance at life.  I think he was there, when I was at my worst.  We’ve had quite a few heart to heart chats.  He is a very warm and kind hearted man.  Thank you Gaetan.

I love you guys with all of my heart.  You are all a true blessing.

Love and light,

Matt

Wow I feel enlightened!

I was sitting in Tim Horton's having a coffee yesterday, while eating an old fashioned doughnut. I couldn't wait for my copy of "The power of now" to arrive, so I printed off the first chapter to read.

I got to the part near the beginning where Tolle described his first inner realization:

"I was awakened by the chirping of a bird outside the window. I had
never heard such a sound before. My eyes were still closed, and I saw
the image of a precious diamond. Yes, if a diamond could make a sound,
this is what it would be like. I opened my eyes. The first light of
dawn was filtering through the curtains. Without
any thought, I felt, I knew, that there is infinitely more to light
than we realize. That soft luminosity filtering through the curtains
was love itself. Tears came into my eyes. I got up and walked around
the room. I recognized the room, and yet I knew that I had never truly
seen it before. Everything was fresh and pristine, as if it had just
come into existence. I picked up things, a pencil, an empty bottle,
marveling at the beauty and aliveness of it all.

That day I walked around the city in utter amazement at the miracle of
life on earth, as if I had just been born into this world."

I was amazed. I kept reading, while finishing my coffee.

As soon as I was done, I left to go walk down to the grocery store, and that’s when it happened. This overwhelming feeling of peace and harmony swept over me. I felt like I was hit with a wave of joy. I felt as though I had finally “gotten it".

I don't really quite know how to explain it; other then to say it was the most intense energetic feeling my conscious mind has ever experienced, and the calmest, most serene feeling my soul has ever known.

Everything I did afterward seemed different. My mind was finally switched off. I could see everyone and everything as an extension of myself. I was everything.

I would like to say that this was a really crazy and profound experience, but truthfully, it wasn't. It was in fact better then that.

The shift of consciousness that I experienced was just so simple, and peaceful. My whole demeanor had changed. The pace at which I walked was slower. I smiled more, and interestingly enough, more people smiled at me.

I got into the grocery store, and had to just stop, shut my eyes, and take in a REALLY deep breath. It was a little overwhelming at first, but felt so nice.

I started my journey around the store, noticing the fruits, the veggies, and all their wonderful smells, and colours. I walked with a slow pace, hands folded in front of each other. Almost like a priest or minister at mass. It just felt SO nice.

I had a memory of a time when Mel and I were sleeping together. The cat kept meowing, and wouldn’t stop. Finally Mel got up 1/2 asleep. At first I heard nothing, then the cat food dish being filled. Mel grumbled something, and came back to bed. That thought made me laugh out loud. RIGHT in the middle of the store! It was funny to think about that time, and how it made me chuckle.

I continued walking through the store, finding little things here, and enjoying a few simple moments there. I had finally gathered all of my purchases, and made my way to the cash. The cashier seemed cheery, and bright. She welcomed me with a “Hello… you look like you’re having a nice night…” I was just BEAMING. I paid for my purchases, and asked to have everything delivered.

I left the store, feeling very good, with a new found sense of grounding and serenity. I took in another deep cold breath, and started my walk home. I waited patiently for the OC Transpo bus. It came shortly after, and I got on, greeting the driver with a warm hello.

The driver and I spoke the whole way home... (Something I NEVER do... as "those people" "Annoyed" me before). We joked about passengers, and shared stories of things that had happened throughout his day. He thanked me for our chat, and I got off the bus. I smiled a HUGE smile, and walked home.

As soon as I got in the door, I put on my jammies, and got the kettle on for tea… Just as I was about to settle in, the phone rang... the groceries were there. It just seemed as though everything was ready, and in sync. I put my things away in the kitchen, enjoyed my tea, and had the most peaceful, and enjoyable rest I’ve had in years.

Love and light,

Matt

Brrrr!

Man... it's -12, but feels like -21 with the wind. It's snowing, and wet; my feet are damp; and I have a little chill. Old man winter, has finally come back for another round.

Funny thing... every year for as far back as I can remember, I HATED winter. Lately I've been on a journey of introspection, self-discovery, and awareness. Throughout this journey, I've discovered that I actually find it hard to hate ANYTHING... even WINTER!

Hate is a VERY strong word, and the power of words feeding our subconcious mind, is a strong one. A friend and fellow blogger Tina Su wrote a wonderful article on the subject.

The truth is... We can usually find something to appreciate in everything. Take every situation, and there is something to appreciate or learn.

Often times when we decide that we hate something, we don't feel as though there is any other way to think about it. Exterior forces have sent this signal to our subconscious so often, that it becomes second nature. The reality is, that the hate we've *decided* to feel towards this subject is a choice. For a more in-depth take on the power of subconscious thought, I suggest you read the article "Train Your Eyes to See Colour, Again" .

Thinks I used to *hate* about winter:

• It's damp
• It's cold
• It's dark
• It's dead
• It's dready

These things may all be true, but if I focus on these things only, then that becomes the reality. If I send this message out into the universe, I will suddenly be surrounded by like minded folks who also *hate* the winter. Do we REALLY want to hear someone say "Man! I'm SO EXCITED for SNOW this Sunday! I can FINALLY bust out my skis!!"!!.... of course not. We've already decided that we *hate* the snow, so why would we stick around a "winter lover"? They have the potential to change our mindset on how we perceive winter. This sets us off kilter, and can be mentally disrupting. We as humans would much rather stay in our state of *hate* and will naturally gravitate towards those that share the same sentiment. Do you see how powerful this mind process is?

Since hate is not part of my mandate anymore, and I choose to remove the word from my vocabulary, I've decided to come up with a NEW list of things I LOVE, or at the very least LIKE about winter:

• It's pretty outside
• You can take your kid tobogganing/sledding!!
• There are a multitude of winter sports to engage in (I would LOVE to start Snowboarding)
• Xmas!!
• It's my Birthday in January!!

And that's just to name a few.

In closing I would ask you all to look on the bright side of things, as there is a bright side too EVERYTHING. Focus on the positives, send those positive vibes out into the universe, and you will be rewarded, with peace, love, harmony, and happiness.

Don't forget your hat and mitts! It's a cold one... and I LOVE IT! :D

Happy Monday folks!

Well another week in the books. Time to start back fresh.

Fight weekend in Montreal was a REAL gong show. I had a blast... it was likely one of the BEST weekends I've had in recent memory.

I got off the bus in Montreal around 7:00pm Friday evening, to meet up with Mel. We went for a coffee @ Tim Horton's and had a WONDERFUL chat. Felt really good to get re-acquainted again. I hadn't seen her in about 6 weeks or so. From there, we rented a movie, went back to her place, ordered Chinese food and just chilled. We didn't end up watching the movie, as we were MUCH too engrossed in good conversation. It was nice to talk about spirituality, and betterment of your personal being. I really enjoyed that.

We woke up late Saturday morning, and decided to go to a little diner down the road from her place. I ordered an extremely large breakfast... It tasted fantastic, but my poor belly can't handle that much wheat and gluten. I must have eaten about 8 slices of bread, along with a pancake, and some french toast. It was brutal... I paid for it for the rest of the evening.

After breakfast, we headed downtown to check out the UFC store! THAT was crazy! It was jammed! There were people all over the place... affliction T-shirts abound! Hung over ring girls lounging (read: sleeping with there head in their hands) in the background... it was crazy. I guess the previous evenings weigh-ins after party was a rough one.

We then walked around a bit more... We bumped into our mutual friend Moz at the Eaton's center. It was good to see him. He was happy to see us, and mentioned that Patrick Côté was at the foot locker! He was doing a fan meet and greet, along with an autograph signing. Pretty cool stuff. We walked around a bit more, and shopped around for a few more hours. Mel bought a really cute hat. I purchased a few Xmas gifts, and we headed back home.

Mél got gussied up for the pending fight night. She always looks so good when she gets done up. Mél is one of those "wake up with bed head, while wearing sweat pants and STILL look smokin' hawt" types. The eye make-up, with fitted black pants, and a plunging v-neck looked amazing. Personally, I just threw on my Team Renzo Gracie BJJ Tshirt, and a pair of dark jeans. I felt under dressed, next to such a beautiful woman. I downloaded the weigh-ins on her laptop, so we could watch them before heading out. Weigh-ins were great... it's go time.

We arrived au Centre Bell for 8:30pm or so, and the place was just getting warmed up... We got in, went for a quick pit stop, then hit up our seats. We were at the TOP top nose bleeder section, and surprisingly the seats we not too too bad! I could see the Octagon perfectly, and the big screens allowed for close up viewing action as well. What a rush.

All in all the fights were great. GSP laid a beating down on KOS for 5 straight rounds. I was nice...

Unfortunately I hadn't gauged or controlled my drinking that well, and found myself quite inebriated, when we left. Lesson learned... don't drink that much... and if you do, pace yourself. Lol. Mél was pretty decent about the whole thing though. I'm thankful for having such an understanding friend... Thanks Mel... You're the best...

Sunday afternoon was more shopping, good chats, and just relaxing. We finally ended up watching the movie that night. We hung out a bit... then I prepared myself for the trek back home. Lots of emotion when I left... but it was nice.

All in all, the weekend was a HUGE success... I had a blast, and can't wait to go back!

Love and light,

Matt

TGIF!!

The weekend has FINALLY COME! FIGHT weekend!! :D I am SOOOOO pumped to see KOS and GSP go at it. They both have amazing wrestling pedigrees and KOS' stand up has REALLY improved since their last battle. This is going to be silly.. I expect a war!

Today I get to see the person that is closest and dearest to me... Mel. I'm going down to Montreal this afternoon, to spend an evening of Chinese food, chats, and a movie. Saturday - we'll be up and at'm early... Can't wait! Meditation, good coffee, and great chats... Fight night, then back home to chill... I really need this weekend. I'm excited!

Quick shout out to friend, and happiness mentor Tina Su. She's not only taught me about how to be free of life's burdens, but how to laugh at yourself once in a while. It's nice to be reminded that we can strive to be happy, but are also human. I love you man!

Please vote for Tina:


Good Mood Gig from SAM-e

She's an amazing woman and an inspiration... I just KNOW she'll make us all proud!

Ok... off to work! Catch you all on the flipside!

I HAVE NO COFFEE IN THE FREEZER!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

Herbal tea it is. I've really been enjoying my teas as of late. I might try and make the switch completely... I gotta start by weening off caffeine though... as I seem to have built up a SERIOUS addiction.

*phew* MAN! What a BEAUTIFUL DAY! it's great! You know... I'm not generally a morning person, nor can I say I usually 'enjoy' winter... but yea... What's there NOT to love? Seriously.

We should all be thankful for each day we're here. Each day is a gift. You could die tomorrow. Cars, boats, houses, money, monetary riches, and the like is just 'stuff' and you can't bring stuff with you when you die.

If we took EVERYTHING we owned, and put it in a building, to set it ablaze.. what would we be left with? If your answer is 'nothing'... then I think it's time to re-evealuate what's important.

Live, Love, and laugh...

Matt

Speaking of coffee... :)

** Amendment from Andie... FRESH POTS!!!!!!!!

HAPPY HUMP DAY!!

Wow! It's already almost noon!! Crazy!

Ok... I have to come right out and say this. I've sorta dropped the meditation ball as of late. I've been training really hard at Muay Thai, and when I get home, I try to unwind, and usually end up sleeping late. I can't seem to get myself out of bed in the morning to do it. Time management is of the essence here. Corrections will be made.

*yawn* 1/2 way there... today is a day filled with haircuts, rent payment, and typing up loose ends, before I leave for Montreal. I hope I don't forget anything.

I got a GREAT compliment on my manipulation entry down below, and was asked to polish it up, with a bit of intro/background, to perhaps have it published! Wonderful news! Anything I can do, to perhaps help someone else relate is just wonderful.

Take care, and have a good one!

Matt

6:59am... I made it! Posting before 7:00am... yay!!

Good morning.... Where's the coffee?? *yawn* I just threw some chicken in the oven, and OH! Coffee's ready... thank GOD...

*sip*

Ahhhhhh... black crack I tell ya....

So... I woke up to some WONDERFUL news. My friend and mentor Tina Su just pulled ahead in the SAM-e "Next good mood blogger" context! I'm so proud of her, and really hope she wins this thing... If there is someone that deserves to win, it's her. You can vote for Tina here. No need to sign up or anything, just click, and vote! Every vote counts... so kindly do so.

So what's up today? It's Tuesday! only 4 more days until UFC 124! I feel like a kid at Christmas - it's kind of ridiculous really. I'm FINALLY going to a live show! I leave Friday afternoon, for the second largest city in Canada - MONTREAL!!! I arrive around 5:00pm or so... to meet up with my best friend Mel. We're going to go for coffee, then possibly a walk somewhere down St-Denis - weather permitting. From there, it's back to her place, for a night in. Chinese food, and movies. It doesn't get much better then that. Next morning, it's up early - a bit of meditation, then breakfast, coffee, and the day is ours to enjoy. That evening is the fight, then back home for a good nights rest. I really need this time off, and am going to take advantage! :D

Well... the chicken is smellin' REALLY good - I've gotta jump in the shower and get this day started.

Have a wonderful Tuesday folks! You're alive, and the world is your oyster... doesn't get much better then that!

Love and light,

Matt

Yay Sobriety!

Today marks my 1st week of sobriety! One week... that's 7 days... 168 hours... Substance free... That's pretty fantastic, if I don't say so myself. The longest I've been sober in the past 21 years is 8 months. Here's to a life time of sobriety, and change. Time to get back to where I should be.

*yawn* *sip coffee* Buuuuurrrr.... -8, and it feels like -13 with the wind. I have a feeling that this week is going to just shoot by. Here's to hoping... because Next Saturday is UFC 124 in Montreal Quebec Canada! I can't WAIT! I'm going to head up Friday evening, to spend the night with my best friend Mélanie, then Saturday we're going to the show! GSP is taking on Josh Koscheck for the welterweight title of the world. It's going to be a gong show for sure!

Well I woke up a little late again, so I have to cut this one short... meditate, shower, and get to work.

Have a wonderful day folks.

Love and light,

Matt

Man... What goes up must come down..

Today has been an interesting one. Got up early, and went for brunch with my daughter, brother, father, and his wife, for his birthday. He turned 60 last Wednesday. We went to Stoneface Dolly's on Preston street. I just LOVE there brunch. It's fantastic. Got home, and spent the day with my daughter.

I spoke with Melanie today... and she mentioned a few things to me that I hadn't realized in the past. About how I am, and the internal struggles, and pain I'm going through. It was nice, but VERY difficult to hear. I realize that I have a few things to work on. Mainly loving myself. You see I have the tendency to rely on others for happiness and comfort. I haven't quite figured out how to find it from within. It's a process that will take time. I'm confident that with the right guidance and proper counseling, I will find inner peace. I just have to have faith.

I seem to have developed this manipulative protection mechanism to deal with my fears of loss, and abandonment. Unfortunately this manipulation has caused a great deal of pain to those around me that I love, and care about deeply. It's as though I subconsciously bring them down my level, to feel better about myself - so that they don't seem superior to me. In doing so, I crush their spirit, and leave them feeling vulnerable, like an open wound. I understand that the people involved have a certain responsibility to there own feelings, but sometimes when you are manipulated, it makes you question your feelings, and can convince you that you are wrong, and that the manipulator is correct. This "game" of building, and destroying can go on a LONG time, until the manipulated party is finally so emotionally crushed, that they have a real hard time picking themselves back up. Once they do however, they see what has happened, and wind up feeling VERY resentful to the manipulator in question. This is more or less what I went through... as the manipulator, and I realize now that it's something I've done in past relationships as well. I just hope through the grace of god, and his light, that I can overcome this, start fresh, and be the true person that I am, and long to be.

Wow... I had a WONDERFUL night last night. I attended a Muay Thai kickboxing demonstration held by my school the Ottawa Academy of Martial Arts. Everyone performed well, and we all had a blast! Lots of great demos, great people, and good times. I couldn't have asked for a better way to spend a Friday evening. I got home around 10:00pm or so, and just relaxed with a nice cup of coffee, and my virtual facebook friends.

I was chatting on MSN with my ex, and REALLY good friend Melanie Ferland about the meaning of life, and how to achieve happiness. Lately I've been going 160mph, and she gently reminded me to stop, and take a few seconds to breathe. Very important advice, and something we often forget when we get caught up in any emotion - including happiness. The blinders go up, and we forget that it's all about balance. Too much of a good thing is just as bad as not enough. Thank you for that Melanie... You're one of my inspirations, and mentors. You're not only a dear friend, but a life teacher as well.


This morning I had the rare pleasure of sleeping in. It happens once in a blue moon... but NOTHING beats getting woken up by a telephone call from your child.

"Good morning daddy! I'm eating honey comb in my PJs...' Hehehehe... I love her to bits. Today we are going to see the movie tangled I can't wait! It looks like a good one! Seems almost like a rip off of Ripenzel. We'll see.

Well that's it for me... time to meditate, have a nice breakfast, shower, and start my day.

Love and light!


Matt

Good morning folks...

So last night I decided to go to bed early - hit the sack at 8:00pm. This never seems to work for me, as I just wound up waking up at at midnight... groggy, confused, and discombobulated. I figured I'd make a cup of my favorite night time herbal tea:




This seemed to do the trick, and I was back to bed by 2:00am... that's when the dream started.

I dreamt that my eight year old daughter was playing outside. Minding her own business, and singing to herself. She decided to go for a walk alone. She wound up on an old rickety bridge - you know the kind of bridge you see in movies... wooden, and unstable. As she was whistling, and skipping down the planks, one broke free, and she screamed, while falling through the cracks, into a MASSIVE body of RAGING white water beneath her. I somehow could sense this back at home, and came RUNNING to her rescue!

I got the the bridge, and RAN across the worn out wooden planks, all the way to where she had seemingly fallen through. I couldn't see anything but HUGE waves, with the water rushing by. The sound was almost deafening. I plunged myself into the icy cold pool, and started moving VERY quickly down the river. Just as I was being sucked down by an undertow, I SHOT UP in bed. I lay there in the dark, breathing pretty hard, and sweating from head to toe. I looked over at the clock... it read 5:00am. What a HORRENDOUS way to start the day. I managed to fall back to sleep, then I woke up at 7:15am. Seeing as I start work at 8:00am - I decided I would have to cut my morning ritual short. I rushed out the door, and got here late.

So here I sit... a little confused, and tired.

Let's see what the rest of the day brings.

*Yawn*

I'm freezing, and tired this morning.... I slept with the window WIDE open, and woke up to 0 Degree weather... Eeeesh...

Seems that I'm much more tired the mornings after I train... I also didn't go to bed that early... something to work on...

*sips water*

*shivers*

FINALLY Warm coffee is ready!

More then half way done the week... down to the home stretch...

*grabs a cup of coffee*

My nose is a bit runny.. gotta make sure I sleep with the window shut next time... This is craziness... I'm pretty tired... and can't get to jump in the shower...

I'm sorta empty in my brain... tired, groggy, still gotta shake the cobwebs...

GOOD MORNING CRUEL WORLD!

I'm cuttin' this one short...

Meditation time...

Wow... Good morning!

Coffee is brewing... is there any better smell in the world then coffee first thing in the morning? I'm not sure... It's a great way to start the day.

Dreams are an interesting thing. I just finished waking up to a strange one. There was a tiny little person at the side of my bed... not a midget, or a child... but an actual small sized person... Sort of like Gary Coleman... They kept telling me that everything was ok, and that it was time to wake up and start the day. So here we are...

Funny thing... I wanted to use this blog as a means of getting all my evening mental waste out, but wound up putting too much thought into what I was going to write. That is what took up most of my thinking process last evening, and seems to bet the only thing that really stuck in my head...

So here I sit... coffee in hand, poised, and ready to take on the day...

*Yawn* time to meditate...

Talk soon...

Matt